Every night before I fall asleep, I
imagine I am holding a large bunch of helium balloons in the middle of a hay
field. I write each of my worries and concerns
on a balloon, and then one by one I release them into the sky. Watching them float away, I am left free.
Most of us have had days where we want
nothing more than to be able to let go.
We find ourselves standing in a field holding all the things we’re
afraid of, all our expectations, all the things we regret, all the things we
wish we could change about ourselves…yet more often than not, we wake up to
find that our worries and troubles are more like rocks than helium balloons. We get frustrated that we’re unable to send
them away into the sky, so instead we try to push and shove them as far away as
we can, or we throw them at the people who we believe threw them at us. We try to get rid of
them, wasting time wishing that boulders were balloons, that we never learn to
sit with them, accept them, and turn them over in our hands until we see them
for what they are. We don’t like how
these rocks can weigh us down, crack us open, carve us out and leave us
exposed. Yet God again reminds us
that’s it’s ok to be vulnerable in the middle of a hay field. It’s ok to hold heavy hands and be
still. With our cracks we are not broken but rather
open to recieve the light and love of others. This is how we begin to be free.
We get thrown rocks. We dig them up. We yell and throw them back. But all the while, maybe God was handing us some of the
stones we needed to build our trail.
No comments:
Post a Comment